At the dawn of this century, the late and unlamented dictator of Turkmenistan Saparmurat Niyazov became a favorite of news editors hungry for weird stories to fill column inches. Styling himself Turkmenbashi, “the Father of All Turkmen,” the eccentric dictator imposed a series of seemingly arbitrary whims upon his post-Soviet populace, famously banning (for instance) gold teeth and ballet dancing. Turkmenbashi also basked in a personality cult that put Stalin’s to shame. A narcissist of world-historic proportions, he renamed the month of January after himself, and insisted that everyone use his mother’s name, Gurbansoltan Eje, when referring to what had been referred to in earlier, less enlightened times, as “bread.”
